Dream a little dream of me

but you would never come around

I hate feeling this way.
So lonely and .. broken. I know other girls have faced this kind of tragedy but it really hits you when it actually happened and there's no way to escape it.
Gosh i hate love. But for some atm must be feeling "Oh yeah i'm gonna spend the rest of my life with them forever".
You always think that and just look at them and say yep they're right for me, i know it. But ever come to think that one day they might leave it all behind. Do you ever think of that ?
If you are in a relationship and thinking this person is the absolute perfect person you wanna be with, are you sure ? Do you want to feel the pain after that?
Sorry to bring it up, but something that just came to my mind about someone in saying that it's his birthday today and i didn't say my wishes to him and also to my friend.
It's not a good feeling. I remembered when i got hurt, seriously got hurt, literally felt soo cut I thought this is it. It's over when it hasn't even begun.
It just brainwashes you and believing the fact that everything's fine, everything will sort out, everything will be just the way you wanted it to be but it just wouldn't ! It never happens.
Everything goes wrong and how are you feeling, fckn devastated and miserable.
UGGGGGH.
Just pisses the shit out of me that every time you feel that somethings about to be the first day of your life turns out to be the worst time to come out.

.. I'm not deeply sorry and i won't ever be. You hurt me hard. You really did. You thought we were gonna last long and i guess everything you said was just to keep me happy. I can never be happy now that i've gotten to know you and been with you, it just breaks my heart that i'm having to see you everyday at school. I don't want that. I don't want to see your face looking at mine. Everything's fine when you're gone, when you're not there.
Gosh i hate you. And your apology.. don't even bother making one.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009 9:24 PM